Contessas hard guy to please

Complete your The Contessas record collection. Discover The Contessas 's full discography. Shop new and used Vinyl and CDs... The Contessas: Hard Guy …

"SISTER! I live and lie for you.
MISTER! Do and I'll die.
You are mine, I possess you,
Belong to you FOREVER! (EVER! EVER!!!)"
-Queen, " The Seven Seas of Rhye "

Troy and Julie Equals held hands as they looked through the glass wall at the unconscious form of the woman that they both called "my first girlfriend." The woman they'd traveled halfway around the globe to be with.

On the other side of the glass, Contessa Helena de San Finzione was on a hospital bed in a white room; a hospital gown covering her, and an oxygen mask over her nose. Two doctors and a nurse were in the room, dressed in Clean Room suits and hooking her up to machines. They'd closed her up half-an-hour before, but were not confident as to whether they would have to go back in or not, so were keeping her in a sterile environment.

"When can Maria come see her?" Julie asked Capitan Gregorio Ortega, standing next to them. While Generalissimo Ramirez was with the other Contessa at the castle, Ortega was freed up to come take charge of the Ultimados guarding the hospital. When he'd gotten the call that there was "An Equals Situation" at the hospital, he told his driver to step on the gas and to use the siren and lights.

"I'm afraid that Contessa-In-Reggenza Maria will be unable to do so. Outside the castle, it is now a risk to National Security for both Contessas to be within one city block of each other."

"Well, that sucks," Julie replied. "Can't someone get a webcam set up or something, so Maria can at least look in on her?"

Although, like her husband; their other, active mutual girlfriend, and La Contessa; Julie Equals knew the secret of Mind Control, she chose not to use it in her suggestion. Her father was a career military man like Capitan Ortega, and she didn't care to use it on him without good cause.

The Capitan nodded.

"It is a good idea. I will put someone on it." He looked over at Troy and Julie. "I am sorry you cannot be in there with her. Either of you." He had read their file and knew how close they were to La Contessa.

Troy turned and smiled at his wife's idea, then turned to Ortega.

"Thank you, Capitan." He looked closer at the Capitan's eyes. "How long since you slept, sir?"

"After a soldier makes it into El Squadra de Ultimados, La Contessa meets with them in private for some... unique additional training. We do not require much sleep. It is why only two of my men were needed to provide you security around-the-clock."

Troy's response was given as an impression of Spike from Buffy. Possibly Catherine Tate.

"Yeah, thanks for that, by the way. Didn't really ask for it, though."

Ortega turned back to face La Contessa before responding.

"YOU did not have to. I should check on the men." He saluted his unconscious Contessa. "They have orders to comply with your every request, Señor y Señora Equals."

He turned and walked away. When he was gone, Julie turned to Troy.

"What do we do now, Master?"

Troy Equals broke the handhold to walk over to a nearby table and grabbed two of the chairs. He brought them back to where Julie still stood.

"What we came here to do, Mistress," he said as he held her chair for her to sit. He set up the other chair next to her and resumed their handhold, looking straight ahead at Helen on the other side of the glass. "Exactly this."

* * *

Susan Bailey had been experiencing a day of firsts. She'd had her first airplane ride, joined 'The Mile-High Club' for the first time, been inside a castle, met royalty face-to-face, first time since working the diner that a swarthy man with a loaded gun had run toward her; and now she was wearing body armor and riding in a military vehicle for the first time. It was Generalissimo Hernando Ramirez's officer's car, but she counted it.

San Finzione's primary industry was tourism. Because most of the bigger hotels in the country were owned by Società Finzione, La Familia de San Finzione's corporation, La Policia had their full co-operation. They were able to quickly verify that there was no Carlos Jimenez; the name on the assassin's identification, registered in any accommodations owned by Società Finzione.

That left the smaller lodgings owned privately or by foreign interests. Primarily airport and theme park hotels and motels, and wine country bed & breakfasts. Their lack of ties to the government meant that La Policia had to visit each one individually. It was in one of the airport motels that they'd located a guest who matched the Generalissimo's description checked in with one suitcase and registered under the name Carlos Jimenez. They surrounded and were ready to secure the empty room, but because it concerned a direct crime against La Contessa herself, procedure demanded that La Squadra de Ultimados be involved in the investigation, and so, word reached Ramirez.

Contessa Maria had wanted to come to the scene as well, but Ramirez would not allow it. Out of courtesy, because Susan was present, they both spoke English.

"Great-Grandmama would be there!" Maria insisted.

"You cannot do the thing that Contessa Helena can do. It is not safe for you. You are needed here now, Contessa."

"Well, if that's all that's keeping her," Susan said, grabbing her purse after Jeanne had seen to her party's overnight bags, Maria explaining to her that all three bags should go to the same guest room. "I, on the other hand, am NOT needed here, and CAN do The Thing that Contessa Helena can do; so, therefore, it's safe for me to come along. So, let's go!"

Ramirez was about to protest when Contessa Maria addressed him.

"Must I give you an order too, Generalissimo?"

"Now, I didn't order that, Maria; Sir." Susan added, serious now. "Nor would I. The entire world has seen the video now, Generalissimo. Of them, only three people watched it and immediately understood exactly how and why you were unable to act and why you must not believe in any way that it was your fault. La Contessa caused me to experience it from your side as well. It laid me low, and I'm still working to forgive her."

Susan gestured that he might want a seat; but just so she didn't have to keep looking up to address the tall man eye-to-eye. Although Ramirez suspected that if she chose to command him, he was making it easier for her, he did so simply out of older-generation gentlemanly manners.

"But that didn't happen to you, sir. You stayed alert and you remembered details that are now aiding the investigation. It was a Kobayashi Maru scenario, Generalissimo. You chose the best possible course. That's what I want to do right now, sir. Troy and Julie are standing watch over Helen, Maria's got Contessa-ing stuff to do, and I'm the only person doing nothing."

Susan had to take a deep breath before she continued.

"I get that Helen and I have enough in common that, other matters to resolve aside; we would probably be friends already if we'd met any other way than what happened. And I'm aware that the primary skills that I bring to the table are 'Carrying Food on Trays,''Star Trek Trivia,' and 'Gotten Into Yoga Recently, So I'm A Bit More Flexible.' From what she's told me of you, you know her fairly well. Either of you: What would willful inaction do to you at a time like this?"

Ramirez nodded and maintained eye contact as he stood again.

"You will wear a vest and helmet, Señorita Bailey, you will not have a gun, and you will never go more than three feet from myself or one of the Ultimados. And STAY in the MIDDLE of us! Always one of us in front of you, always one of us behind."

He walked off to prepare. Susan stopped to give Maria a goodbye hug and whisper in her ear.

"Nobody's ever called me ' Señorita ' outside a Mexican restaurant before," Susan told her giddily.

"He is married," Maria whispered back with a titter.

"And he's not Troy, but still, that was some serious 'Antonio Banderas' dad' shit there. 'Always one of us in front of you.'"

They stepped back together and smiled.

"Go be safe and let me know what happens, Susan." Maria gave another smile of happiness at meeting her dear online friend. "Call it an order from La Contessa."

Susan knew that Maria was making a joke, however, it reminded her that by accepting San Finzione citizenship, she was now "a subject of the... well, it's a tiara, not a crown, but same deal." And that brought her another first: Her first order from "her Contessa." The blow was softened by the fact that it'd been given by Contessa Maria, rather than Contessa Helena.

Susan gave a strange salute that involved rotating her wrist five times and smacking herself in the forehead with the back of her hand, then departed.

* * *

La Policia kicked in the door of the motel room. Four Ultimados followed behind them and kept them covered as they searched the bathroom, closet, and under the bed. Once the room was declared safe and clear, Ramirez and Susan followed behind with the others.

An empty suitcase lay open on the table, and the bed had hardly looked used. Medication bottles were found in the waste bin for drugs called Carmustine and Lowmustine. It was an item in the closet that held the most interest for La Policia: A small shrine comprised of cut-out pictures of Contessa Helena de San Finzione from various publications.

Susan had pulled out her iPad and was looking up the two drugs as she studied the bed. La Contessa's gift iPads had Wi-Fi access everywhere in San Finzione, and she was able to find them quickly. She stopped to look in the bathroom before seeing what everyone was staring at in the closet.

"Well, that's fake," she said aloud, causing Ramirez and the Prefect of Police to turn their heads. "Also, those two pill bottles in the trash? That combination is used to treat Hodgkin's Lymphoma and Brain Tumors."

Ramirez's eyes lit up. He took out his phone and started composing a text. He looked at Susan quizzically as he typed.

"We suspected some manner of brain injury. Why do you say the thing in the closet is fake?"

"Who is this woman, Generalissimo?" The Prefect of Police asked.

"Eh," Ramirez said, turning to face him. "She is a special envoy from the castle. 'Extend every courtesy' and so on." He turned back to Susan. "Why do you think this?"

Susan took another good look at the collage/shrine before answering.

"All of these pictures are from the last two months. That's the one they used for Populace Magazine's "Most Powerful Thirty Under 30" issue. Print ads from the tourism campaign. There she is at the Grand National last month. That paparazzi shot of her coming out of the ocean where you can see her nipples through the bikini top was around that time too."

The Prefect decided to join their conversation more closely.

"We'd need to get a psychological profile done on the assassin," he said. "But I think this speaks of insanity."

"You're SUPPOSED to think that," Susan replied. "But no, going from 'Hey, the TV lady gives me a boner' to 'Can't take my eyes off of you' to 'I must stab you, THAT will prove my love' in the space of two months?"

"If, as you suggest, the man had some terminal injury," The Prefect responded. "That might cause him to move up his timetable."

The Generalissimo began to nod in agreement, but stopped as he hit Send and paid more attention to Susan.

"Don't you guys watch SVU," Susan asked. "With that kind of psycho, the knife always represents his cock. Now, from the reports I've been allowed to see, his knife was what? A four-inch blade with a two-inch handle? If you could choose a thing that represents YOUR cock, Prefect, would you choose something that's four-inches long? Or made of glass?"

While they were still stunned both at the idea and at Susan's casual use of the word "cock," and others within earshot weree struggling to not break up laughing at the woman talking to their boss like this, she continued.

"And I've looked in the trash, on the bed, in the bathroom, and now in the closet too. You know what I don't see? That's in every motel room?"

"A Bible?" Ramirez asked.

"SEMEN," she said so loudly and suddenly that a few of the seasoned police officers and elite soldiers couldn't suppress a snort. "Every cop or news show where they go into a motel room, there's traces of semen everywhere! I'm sure if you run one of those black-lights in here, you'll see it all over from every freak who's stayed in this room before. But there's no cum on the bedsheets, no wadded Kleenex on the floor or in the trash, none near this 'psycho shrine' you've found, which, by the way, looks like it folds-up neatly into that suitcase on the table."

They puzzled at that for a moment, officers stepped outside to laugh, then Susan continued.

"Think about it: You're a nutbag, you've just arrived in the city where the object of your obsession; the woman who's been making you constantly hard for the last two months lives. And in a few short hours, you'll meet her and kill her and somehow make all your fantasies come true in the process. But you've got a few hours to kill first. Nothing to do but kneel at your shrine and whisper 'Soon, my love. Soon.' Until it's time to go achieve your Sick Fuck Dream. He checked in about sixish? So, the tour was at noon, let's say he left an hour or two before, that leaves four or five hours in THIS room. Nothing to watch but Basic Cable, and nothing to read but the Bible."

She paused and looked squarely at them both before finishing.

"Gentlemen, crazy or not, with those long, tense, final hours of nothing but waiting for time to tick by in this room, wouldn't you need to jerk off at least once? Probably in front of your Nutso Shrine so you can look at those nipples in that bikini? I'm not even THAT kind of crazy, but with so much Nothing to do, I'd have to step into that shower, grab the hose and see what the water pressure's like in San Finzione at least once. But this guy just unpacked his shrine, had a nap, took his meds, and left."

Ramirez seemed to chew on the thought as he answered.

"Or, with a brain tumor, he may have taken his medication first, slept off some side-effect of them, then gone to perform the job. He knew we would soon track him to this room, he made no effort to conceal the trail. We were meant to find this so that the investigation would end with him being written off as a solitary lunatic. This is not the end of the trail."

He turned to the Prefect and sent another text. The Prefect's phone buzzed in his pocket.

"I will need the information on those pill bottles immediately. Send it to myself and to the email address I just texted you, Martin. A friend with Interpol is looking at this from another angle as a favor for me. I'm certain he will be interested in any fingerprints or such that you find. I will ask him to pass his information on to you as well."

The Prefect nodded and left the conversation to command his people. Ramirez extended his hand to Susan, who took it. His handshake surprised Susan. It was firm, but gentler than she'd expected from a hand she was certain had squeezed the life out of a man's neck on more than one occasion.

"Thank you for listening." Susan said after the handshake.

"The woman that you still work to forgive regards you as a friend, Señorita Bailey. Should you meet my wife and children, I will be forced to deny this; but Contessa Helena de San Finzione is the smartest woman that I know. She would not seek your forgiveness if you were not intelligent as well; and what you say worth listening to."

Susan smiled through the clear ballistic plastic faceguard of the armored helmet she wore and shifted the thick, heavy, armored vest that they didn't have in her size and shape and was now pressing down on her breasts.

"I think we should return to the castle and get you out of that gear. Contessa Maria is waiting to hear back as well."

With a nod and more shifting of the vest, they departed.

* * *

Helena was on her back in her own bed in Castle Finzione. At least, the dreamscape version that she'd created of it.

She dug her nails into the satin sheets as Suzy-Q's tongue brought her over the edge for the Stopped-Counting-Around-6th time. Helena took hold of her shoulders and helped pull Suzy-Q up the length of her body until their lips met and she tasted herself on the other woman's lips.

"Shouldn't we be exhausted by now," Helena asked as her hand slipped down between Suzy-Q's legs and idly stroked her pussy.

"I'm a figment or something, so I don't get tired. And since this is all in your head, it probably works like The Matrix for you; where you're only exhausted if you really want to be."

"If it IS The Matrix , I gotta get to a fuckin' phone and warn people."

The only thing that had kept Helena from completely giving herself over to the pleasure was that they'd concluded that a bomb was ready to go off at the Ministry of Science, and until she awoke from surgery, she had no way to warn anyone. Because time didn't seem to be passing while she was here, for all she knew, she was too late.

"Well," Suzy-Q said, rolling off of her to snuggle. "We've tried all the usual movie stuff here. Everything but getting killed so you wake up in the real world, but that doesn't feel like something we should risk. The only one we've got left is hoping that someone out there says whatever the 'magic words' are to bring you round."

"Hmm..." Helen mused. "Yeah, I remember Mel Blanc, the voice of Looney Tunes, got in a car wreck and went into a coma. The doctors couldn't wake him up until one of them walked in and said 'Eh, What's Up, Doc?" and he responded in Bugs Bunny's voice. I suspect those aren't MY magic words, though. You wouldn't know what they are, would you?"

"Nope. I'm not like those 'spirit guide' dicks. Susan wouldn't want anyone to get hurt, either. If I had the answer, I'd've tell you."

"And I forgot her parents died in a car wreck, like Troy's, so I'm sorry if that was 'triggering' or anything." Suzy-Q shook her head. "So, we just fucking wait, or fuck AND wait, until whenever someone says Wingardium Leviosa ?"

"I don't think it'll be that exactly, but something, yeah. Wanna go again?"

"Not yet," Helena said, holding her close. "Liking this right now."

They held each other in silence.

* * *

At 2300 hours, the Ultimados guarding the hospital were changing shifts. As the only ones on their flight here, there'd been no meal service, and Troy Equals glanced at the clock and realized how long it'd been since either of them ate something that wasn't from a vending machine.

"We should get along to the Castle, Mistress," he told his wife, standing up and offering his hand to raise her from her chair. "Maria's waiting for us, and if anything changes, we'll see it on the webcam." He gestured toward the camera that had been brought into the clean room.

Julie Equals pulled her hand away from her best friend's and folded her arms across her chest as she turned back to Helena on the other side of the glass.

"No, Troy! I am staying right here! She's going to wake up, and I'm going to be right here when she does."

"You're tired and hungry, Julie. We both are. I know Maria's happy to see Susan, but she needs us too. We need to get going."

Julie stood up and pounded her fist on the glass.

"FUCK THAT! I will use the fucking emergency trigger on you, Troilus! You go if you want!"

Troy understood that anything he said at this point might lead to more tears. His wife had cried more on this day than she had in all the days since they'd sold the two houses, with no fence between the yards, that their families had always called home. If he didn't let this play out, Troy knew that Julie would be smoking again by midnight. He closed his mouth and she continued.

jjustin beiber is not gay who ever started that rumor r zo gay n stupid i mean y would u rite that mayb u guys r just jealous u guys r stupid justin beiber means alot 2 m i zo bak off

Contessas Hard Guy To PleaseContessas Hard Guy To Please